My inspiration for this article came from my friend, Candace, who responded to my last post about my husband’s silliness. She’s the one who sent me this picture of the gorillas and said it was of two females enjoying a silly secret that only the two of them understand. She knows laughter is the best medicine.

It is my friend, Pete, however, who is responsible for me writing this. He laid out a ball-buster project for me and I reluctantly agreed to do it.

Ball-buster is defined as an arduous task. Ballbuster, on the other hand, is a person who is relentlessly aggressive, intimidating, or domineering. See the difference? Pete is definitely not the latter. But he does hold my feet to the fire.

He knows I can procrastinate and challenged me to write four articles in April. Make them spontaneous and short and just get them out there. Then write four more in May. One must be a video of you talking. Good grief! My coach had suggested the same video assignment, but I knew Pete wasn’t going to let me slide.

Yes, the task is arduous. It’s not easy being inspired to come up with new ideas to write about, and then get them written.

Adding to my sense of urgency is my trip to Virginia next week to visit my family. I’m bringing my mom back to California for almost two weeks. So I need to get crackin’ on this assignment. The last post I wrote was neither spontaneous nor short, but I’m still counting that as the first of four for April.

Anyway, Candace really got me thinking about my husband’s silliness when she wrote:

“I’m convinced that by clowning, he was able to communicate truth with lightness and put those around him at ease instantly.”

My response, in part:

“During 36 years with Tony I experienced an extremely loving, compassionate, caring, sensitive, funny, sometimes frustrated man. The clowning that you describe sometimes struck me as inauthentic. But it was who he was. As much as I may have tried to change him, he never wavered from that persona. He often said that his father’s humor, as told to Tony by friends and family, was exactly what showed up in Tony, even though he never knew his father.”

Of course, I would do just about anything to hear that silliness again. Humor is one of the things that helped ease my pain. I think Tony knows that I wake up almost every morning grateful for what we had and for those who remain. And I am so fortunate and grateful for the new life I am creating for myself. I’m going to keep focusing on the humor.

I’ll end with some of his silliness and then an awesome video.

Tony broke this bed after jumping on it.

Being silly singing to his daughter.

He just couldn’t stop himself from being silly.

There are surprises throughout this Gratitude Dance video. Watch it to the end.

And a final note to Pete: (This is short, spontaneous, and pretty much unedited. I’m going to hit the publish button anyway.)